Friday, July 18, 2014


Cold, Harsh, Damned


I think we all know that, don’t we?

We always try our best to be a part of something surrounding us. It’s normal to act in that particular way. Us organisms, animate beings, are meant to adapt with our surroundings. That reality is the particular place we all are. We are in the side of sanity. We are meant to be—“normal”, you see. But what we don’t really realize is that, reality tends to, break it off. Reality gives us the ability to be happy, and to be sad, but not to be absolutely ridiculous, because that leads onto another path—the path where some are considered the opposite of the sane. Trust me, it doesn’t result delightful for some.


We are in the dance studio in life. We are supposed to follow every single choreography it gives. We are supposed to dance by the rules of ballet-the correct ones. A perfect pirouette, or the perfect way to deal professionally at work. It all comes down to how we dance through life. How we become “human”, imperfect creatures, loving and hating, inhaling and exhaling. Living organisms who dance through the world.

Then what are ghosts?

They represent the past, the memories, the love that used to exist.

Can they dance through life too?

I learnt one thing from The Fault In Our Stars. Pain demands to be felt. However, after the passing of the main character, everyone else remains ALIVE. Life is not a DAMN BOOK. It lives on, with every single one of us. The way Hazel Grace still goes on her routines of surviving after Augustus Water’s passing.

Then I thought to myself, Gus clearly represents who I am, completely. I am SCARED of OBLIVION. It thrills down my spines, I know that I’m born to leave a mark in the world. I’m born to one day be an honorable ghost to the world. Michael Jackson, Albert Einstein, Whitney Houston, Marilyn Monroe, or just Van Gogh who never got the bling when he was breathing.

You see, even the ghosts dance. They dance to their own deadly tune of keeping the world alive. The pastel pink memories floating with the thin air, sending them to a better place—but with memories that lasts with the world. I’m not saying that death is something we should “look forward to”. I’m saying that before we die-we have to make the YOLO theory sort of work. You Only Live Once, so be foolish, but make sure you make up to be such a person remembered by the world, make sure the world honors your ghost. Make sure that, you leave a mark in the world. You trace your footprints in the sand that have the world captivated in awe. Make sure you are a ghost to not be scared of due to being supernatural, but to be scared of to set up the standards so HIGH that the skies compete with it. Make sure that your limit is beyond the skies above. Make sure that everyone knows you were here.

This past week, I learnt such a valuable lesson. That if you get them talking, you’re doing it right. Tracing a footprint doesn’t mean you’re impressing everyone, darling. It means that you create an explosion of such complexity that the world can’t shut up but talk about it. Make sure that the explosion is that strong. At one point, I felt a bit of the spark from the firework the explosion gave me, which brought me to the ground. However, that just woke me up as a fighter twice the stronger, astonishing my dreams to the moon, having to proof myself that I am more than I thought I would be.


Make sure your kids will look at you proud, make sure you inspire a generation, make sure you NEVER EVER EVER aim for second best. As much as I know these words don’t match the pictures, it actually does. It is a rendition of how I feel, of this spark inside me so negative, yet so sweet. So misunderstood, with a last goodbye. Take my body, but not my brain – that is what I always use as a particular ideology.

The ghosts of World War II, the ghosts of the Nazi, the ghosts that never ever get the chance to breathe. Those who linger in the after life right now. They exist to commemorate the beautiful life we have today. To mark history, and be remembered with oblivion, and just that. Though, however, they have a past in this world. They set their foot on a particular ground, or womb. They all have the same exact chance as us who life in the better, luckier background. We are all winners, today, make sure that counts. Make sure the heavenly voices they utter from the other dimension towards us is worth it. Make sure we never take anything for granted. We all have different paths, but be the best in whatever we are.
Imagine how you were created. Millions of sperm raced to the finish line. One determined who you are today, and won. Some of my friends were “miracles”, some almost dying in the process of maternity, some being a result of their sibling’s miscarriage, some being a result of an unexpected baby(since the person’s parents were too old). We were all born winners—champions to be precise. We were all meant for the top price, so embrace it. Make sure you know how lucky you are today, make sure you dance through life with it. Don’t be a ghost to the world, make sure you’re human enough to be it.


BALLETELLAB is a made up word for this portfolio to represent mirrors and reflections. Ballet and Ballet in reverse, with T being in the middle. T representing Time. I wanted to create something simple yet “The Photographic Sense” enough. I wanted to make sure the photographs tell a story different to every one. I want the melancholy to shine with a particular passion. Something to make each and every one of us remember, that in our darkest hours, our passion speak up. We have to make sure our passion shine brighter than our mood. Making sure that we are all finishing our deeds on becoming a champion, no matter what a hater has got to say.

My mom, tonight, told me that when you start having haters, you’re starting to become “the next big thing”, because your name is reaching out to people who DON’T LIKE YOU. You get it?. So what I’m trying to say in this post is that, no matter what happens in life, make sure you’re doing the right thing. The right thing you BELIEVE in. Our mindset may not be the same, but make sure you stand for it as much as I do. Make sure that you remind yourself that YOU ARE NOT WRONG. MAKE SURE TO REALIZE THAT YOU ARE LUCKY ENOUGH TO NOT BE LIKE THE REST OF THE WORLD, MAKE SURE YOU ARE SPECIAL ENOUGH TO STAND UP.


The idea of implementing negatives of my work is highly inspired by Luca Finotti’s works. I’ve been an admirer of the way he directs the art that just conveys so much passion. Negatives move me in a way I just don’t understand. It looks like a highly photoshopped sculpture-like figure with stains of tint just running down weirdly. That is just how beautiful our life is. It isn’t perfect, it is experimental. It is the way that it should be. The way that it is just screaming on top of our lungs. Wanting to believe in themselves. That is what I want to make sure my readers believe me. Hate me or Love me, make sure you Love yourself first. Make sure you never lose sight of what’s important and gracious to you. Make sure you stand for your own right. Make sure that, even you hate me, you love something. Make sure you are surrounded by the love you deserve. Make sure you love yourself the way you want to be loved, and take the consequences of being hated the way you are hating. Make sure you remember that whatever happens, it happens for a reason.

UNIONS! I know this post should’ve had a more scenic, sad, and dark literacy written with it. However, I just wanted to interpret how much soul I put in my art. I want my passion as a wannabe to be a winner to shine with it. Making sure that people cherish themselves by just reading this. Being an inspiration towards the world is clearly, all I want. You see? If you don’t comprehend, appreciate, when you do, applaud. You don’t get to stand in their foot steps, so make sure you appreciate that passion. If you don’t like the person, go make it personal. If you don’t like the art, just believe that there is a message to be conveyed with it. I want to make sure that art works as the way it should, to tell a story in a different way. To move people, to make them believe, or just, adore. Don’t lead destruction to it, if it was made to be loved. Make sure that you don’t become a ghost when you are still breathing. Last goodbyes are made for the dead, the alive should hold on to one thing, and that is hope.

PAR.Reinhardt Kenneth
Model.Livia Kriwangko
MUA/Stylist.Catharina Avellia Tjakra


1 comment:

  1. Stunning as always ! Loving the dark ambience going on here Rei :)